Thursday, July 30

On Hiatus.

Things have started to go a little fine day by day. We've decided not to think about the things that just happened over the weekend. We can't really do much about it as for now, well sort of but yeah.

Attended dinner with the boyfriend at his mom's place, it was nice, real nice that I had fun doing the dishes with the boyfriend over an hour or so. It was great fun. *smiles.

I have fallen sick over the past two days, yesterday was the most horrible day ever. I went to school in the morning, got my temp checked like any other morning, and it was 36.9 degrees, by the time I got into class, I didn't feel too great so I had to call up the boyfriend to get me and bring me to the hospital. Got checked and all that, and by this time, my temp got up to 38.9 degrees. Temp was playing around with me and it wasn't fun.

Koo had to drive me back home and fetch my car at school and send it back to mine. And then had to go, but he came again after lunch or so cause I asked for some cooling pads, and he went off again after an hour or so just after feeding me. And he came again in the evening to bring me some drink and changed the cooling pad on my forehead.

I felt like shit and I looked like shit yesterday, and thank goodness I feel much more better now than yesterday. Now my boyfriend doesn't need to worry that much when he's away.

Anyhoos, I'll be on hiatus for a little while, all because I don't have a proper ownership of a laptop at the moment and all that, so its quite difficult for me. Hmph! I'll try to update as much as I can. Well that's it for now.

Monday, July 27

Aging.

My birthday was just yesterday and I have to thank everyone who came to celebrate it with me.

But I'd like to give a big big thanks to my boyfriend - Koo Jinchen. I love you. Thank you for spending so much on my 20th birthday. It was a night to remember.

Well, this is update is for Belle.

We had a barbeque at Koo's place and half of the crowd that I invited came between 2000Hrs up until 0200Hrs/0300Hrs. The barbeque was a hit. Everyone was enjoying themselves and that included myself.

Walked around, being a nice friendly host and hostess talked with everyone and by the strike of 0000Hrs, everyone sang Happy Birthday to me, and it was really nice. Not forgetting, we - Me and Koo were trenched. Dean picked up a basin of water (ice cold) and spilled it all over us while Asnal took a picture of it.

I was surprised as I got there, he said he didn't get me any present cause he spent at some point that night, he passed me a gift, and I thought it was from someone else, as I asked, he said it was from him, and I opened it right infront of everyone, and I could not believe that he got me a Chanel purse, the one I have been eying on for sometime.

The night was very enjoyable despite a little situation where someone stole my laptop as well as my phone that night. I cried, I cried for the whole day and night. It hurt so much losing my valuables. *sigh. But we did a police report, so we'll let them handle it.

Anyhoots, and we went to DST to retrieve back my number and right after that we went for dinner at Misato, just like I wanted. It meant alot to me that he spent alot on my birthday, I can't describe how much I appreciate his effort on making things happened.

It is by far the best birthday celebration I've ever had.

...thank you so much for everything, you made everything worth while

Friday, July 24

Don't Kill Me!



I am so gonna get killed for uploading this!

But its funny. *giggles. Well that's us in our own world of fun and laughter. I have no idea what I'll ever do without this boy.

Anyhoots, today was a little productive day, went to get stuff for tomorrow's thing. And I must say I'm a little excited, and I appreciate that he's trying to make it as nice as possible and I know things will fall into place for tomorrow.

...the little things we do for each other

Thursday, July 23

Organising.


Think think think! Plan plan plan! Everything is going to be alright! *smiles

...and we're off to outer space!

Wednesday, July 22

I Love...

...the fact that we can be our retardedly silly selves around each other

Dream big.

I've got a dream of owning a house - a bungalow to be precise. Where I'm going to have a family of my own and all those commitment stuff y'know?

I pretty much loved bungalows since I was a little girl and as I grew up, I've thought about how it should look like. I'd prefer the house to be white with brown framed windows and blue rooftop, whereas the interior has to be oh-so cozy, with a big big living room and should be nicely organized. It should have a big backyard with a swimming pool, green ass grass, pretty pretty flowers and big oak trees.

It hit me last night, when we went home just after the stadium made me think about having a house of our own and other stuff alike.

I know this is such a big dream, but one day, it's gonna happen.

...it would be so nice, wouldn't it?

Monday, July 20

That's what's up!


The weekend just ended, and I'm glad everything is all G as of now. This boy right there, he has given me the greatest laughter, joy and happiness. I love this boy right here. So damn much!

Thank you for coming over for a couple of hours, it was well spent. *smiles.

...we're the best lookin' retards on earth

Sunday, July 19

*smiles

...i love it when you say it

Cats!


Bongs, the adopted stray cat!

Po's Babies!

Friday, July 17

Oh-puh-lease.

Things are way beyond the past and people change not because someone changed them into something they are not. It's their call, it's their choice. It's called a matter of respect, rules or whatever you want to call it are being set to see whether they can respect these little rules. If they do, then it's their choice to keep it that way.

Know what I mean?

I respect you, but I don't think you do.

Time to grow up, quick!

Tuesday, July 14

Comp.




...Best of Luck to all Inliners for tomorrow's Skate Comp.

Guess who's back!?


I went for netball after school, it's good to be a little more active nowadays, it's great fun for me. Especially to be back around them FeeQs despite the whole less hanging out together and all that. And tomorrow, another game! *thumbs up! And guess who I bumped into at TK this evening? Aslin - Scottman. He just got back like for 4 days. Good to bump into him and bumping into Hadi Dutsy too.


Guess who's back to school!? *smiles. Yes, it's the Baby - Rats. Thank god! And to add, Maya is in our college too. So, it's more fun for me. *smiles.

I haven't had sleep for almost 36 hours, don't ask why, but I'm happy things have gone alright this morning. It was quite a long chat, but it's worth it despite the whole cussin' and all that. *smiles.

...time will let it happen

Monday, July 13

Not Again, Please.

I've been having problems with my jaw again for the past few days, well maybe since last week. My jaw is fucking up on me and I did some research just because I can.

I hope I don't need to get the procedure done again for the second time. *sighs.

Well here's a post about Jaw Arthritis.




There are many types of arthritis that affect the jaw and cause pain. The jaw joint is called the temperomandibular joint.The temporomandibular joint is the joint that allows interaction between the temporal bone of the skull and the lower jawbone (mandible). There are two temporomandibular joints, one on each side of the face just in front of the ears. Ligaments, tendons, and muscles support the joints and are responsible for jaw movement.

Within the temporomandibular joint there are moving parts that allow the upper jaw to close on the lower jaw (i.e. biting and chewing, talking and yawning). It is one of the most frequently used of all the joints in the body.

Many TMJ-related symptoms are caused by the effects of physical and emotional stress on the structures around the joint. These structures include the muscles of the jaw, face, and neck; the teeth; the cartilage disc at the joint; and nearby ligaments, blood vessels, and nerves.

All of these stresses can result in muscle spasm. This muscle spasm causes the formation of trigger points -- contracted muscles and pinched nerves in the jaw, head, and neck. Trigger points can refer pain to other areas, causing a headache, earache, or toothache.

Other possible causes of TMJ-related symptoms include arthritis, fractures, dislocations, and structural problems present since birth.

Most often, the cause of a temporomandibular disorder is a combination of muscle tension and anatomic problems within the joints. Muscle pain and tightness around the jaw (myofascial pain syndrome) come mainly from muscle overuse, often brought on by problems of misalignment of the upper and lower sets of teeth, missing teeth, injury to the head or neck, or even toothache. Pain is also produced by trying to open the jaw too widely. Muscle pain and tightness can also result from clenching or grinding the teeth (bruxism) at night due to psychologic or sleep-related stress. Clenching and grinding while asleep exert far more force than clenching and grinding while awake.

Poor posture can also be an important factor. For example, holding the head forward while looking at a computer all day strains the muscles of the face and neck.

Other factors that might aggravate TMJ symptoms are inability to relax, poor diet, and lack of sleep.

In internal joint derangement, the disk inside the joint lies in front of its normal position. Internal joint derangement can occur with or without reduction. In internal joint derangement with reduction, which is the more common type (occurring in about one third of the adult population), the disk lies in front of its normal position only when the mouth is closed. As the mouth opens and the jaw slides forward, the disk slips back into its normal position. As the mouth closes, the disk slips forward again. In internal joint derangement without reduction, the disk never slips back into its normal position, and the degree to which the mouth can be opened is limited.

Arthritis in a temporomandibular joint may result from osteoarthritis, rheumatoid arthritis, infectious (septic) arthritis, Lyme disease, or injury. The cartilage in the temporomandibular joints is not as strong as the cartilage in other joints. Osteoarthritis, which is due to wearing away of cartilage, can result.

Jaw discomfort with chewing may be a symptom of giant cell arteritis, a potentially severe inflammatory condition that affects blood vessels.

Rheumatoid arthritis affects the temporomandibular joint in about 17% of people with this type of arthritis. The temporomandibular joint generally is the last joint to be affected by rheumatoid arthritis.

Ankylosis is loss of joint movement resulting from fusion of bones within the joint or calcification (the deposit of calcium into body tissues) of the ligaments around it.

Hypermobility (looseness of the jaw) results when the ligaments that hold the joint together become stretched. In hypermobility, dislocation is usually caused by the shape of the joints, ligament looseness (laxity), and muscle tension. It may be caused by trying to open the mouth too wide or by being struck on the jaw.

Symptoms of temporomandibular disorders include headaches, tenderness of the chewing muscles, and clicking or locking of the joints. Sometimes the pain seems to occur near the joint rather than in it. Temporomandibular disorders may be the reason for recurring headaches that do not respond to usual medical treatment. Other symptoms include pain or stiffness in the neck radiating to the arms, dizziness, earaches or stuffiness in the ears, and disrupted sleep.

People with temporomandibular disorders have difficulty opening their mouth wide.

People with muscle pain usually have very little pain in the joint itself. Rather, they feel pain and tightness on the sides of the face upon awakening or after stressful periods during the day. Nighttime clenching and grinding of the teeth may cause a person to awaken with a headache, which may slowly diminish over the day. As the jaw opens, it may move slightly (deviate) to one side or the other. The chewing muscles are typically tender to the touch.

Internal joint derangement with reduction usually causes a clicking or popping sound in the joint when the mouth opens wide or the jaw shifts from side to side. In many people, these joint sounds are the only symptoms. However, some people experience pain, particularly when chewing hard foods. In a small percentage of people who have missing teeth and who grind their teeth, there is progression to locking of the joints.

With osteoarthritis, the person feels a grating sensation in the temporomandibular joints when opening and closing the mouth. When osteoarthritis is severe, the top of the jawbone flattens out, and the person cannot open the mouth wide. The jaw may also shift toward the affected side, and the person may be unable to move it back.

Rheumatoid arthritis usually affects both temporomandibular joints about equally. When rheumatoid arthritis is severe, especially in young people, the top of the jawbone may degenerate and shorten. This damage can lead to sudden misalignment of many or all of the upper and lower teeth. If the damage is severe, the jawbone may eventually fuse to the skull (ankylosis).

Typically, calcification (the deposit of calcium into body tissues) of the ligaments around the joint (extraarticular ankylosis) is not painful, but the mouth can open only about 1 inch or less. Fusion of bones within the joint (intraarticular ankylosis) causes pain and more severely limits jaw movement.

In a person with hypermobility, the jaw may slip forward completely out of its socket (dislocate), causing pain and an inability to close the mouth. Dislocation may occur suddenly and repeatedly.

A physician diagnoses a temporomandibular disorder based on a person's medical history and on a physical examination. Part of the examination involves gently pressing on the side of the face or placing the little finger in the person's ear and gently pressing forward while the person opens and closes the jaw. Also, the doctor gently presses on the chewing muscles to detect pain or tenderness and notes whether the jaw slides when the person bites.

When a doctor suspects internal joint derangement, further tests can be done. Magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) is now the diagnostic procedure of choice.

A doctor suspects osteoarthritis when a creaking sound is heard when the person opens his mouth (crepitus). X-rays and a computed tomography (CT) scan or MRI can confirm the diagnosis. If hypermobility is the cause, the person generally can open the mouth wider than the breadth of three fingers; the jaw may be chronically dislocated. If ankylosis is the cause, the jaw's range of motion tends to be markedly reduced.

Treatment varies considerably according to the cause. Two common treatments are splint therapy and analgesics to relieve pain.

Splint therapy usually is the main treatment for jaw muscle pain and tightness. For people who realize that they clench or grind their teeth, splint therapy can help them break the habit. A thin plastic splint is made to fit over either the upper or the lower set of teeth and is adjusted to give the person an even bite. The splint, usually worn at night (a nightguard), reduces grinding, allowing the jaw muscles to rest and recover. For pain during the day, a splint allows the jaw muscles to remain relaxed and the bite to be stable, thereby reducing discomfort. The splint can also prevent damage to teeth that are under exceptional stress from the grinding. Day splints are worn only until symptoms subside, usually fewer than 8 weeks. Longer use may be warranted depending on the severity of symptoms.

Physical therapy may also be prescribed. Physical therapy may involve ultrasound treatment, electromyographic biofeedback (in which the person learns to relax the muscles), spray and stretch exercises (in which the jaw is stretched open with a passive jaw motion device after the skin over the painful area has been sprayed with a skin refrigerant or numbed with ice), or friction massage. Transcutaneous electrical nerve stimulation (TENS) also may help. Stress management, sometimes along with electromyographic biofeedback, often brings dramatic improvement.

Drug therapy may also be helpful. For instance, muscle-relaxing drugs, such as cyclobenzaprine, may be prescribed to ease tightness and pain, particularly while the person waits for a splint to be made. However, these drugs are not a cure, generally are not recommended for older people, and are prescribed for only a short time, usually for a month or less. Analgesics such as aspirin or other nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs (NSAIDs) also relieve pain. Sleep aids (sedatives) may be used occasionally and for a short time to help people who have trouble sleeping because of the pain.

Injection of the jaw joint with lidocaine and glucocorticoid may be helpful.

Regardless of the type of treatment, most people experience significant relief within about 3 months. If the symptoms are not severe, many people recover without treatment within 2 to 3 years.

In internal joint derangement with or without reduction, treatment is needed only if a person has jaw pain or trouble moving the jaw. If a person seeks treatment right after symptoms develop, a dentist or doctor may be able to manually move the disk back into its normal position. If a person has had the disorder for fewer than 3 months, a splint may be applied to hold the lower jaw forward. This splint keeps the disk in position, permitting the supporting ligaments to tighten. Over 2 to 4 months, the splint is adjusted to allow the jaw to return back to its normal position, with the expectation that the disk will remain in place.

A person with internal joint derangement with or without reduction should avoid opening the mouth wide—for instance, when yawning or biting into a thick sandwich—because injured joints are not as protected in these activities as would be a normal jaw. People with this disorder are advised to cut food into small pieces and to eat food that is easy to chew.

Sometimes the slipped disk becomes stuck in front of the temporomandibular joint, preventing the jaw from opening fully. The disk must then be manually moved out of position to allow the joint to move fully. Passive jaw motion devices, which stretch the jaw, have been used to slowly increase jaw motion. These devices are used several times a day. One such device is a threaded screw-type instrument that is placed between the front teeth and turned, much like a car jack, to gradually create a wider opening. If such a device is not available, then a doctor may use a stack of tongue depressors placed between the front teeth, with an additional tongue depressor being added to the middle of the stack.

If internal joint derangement cannot be treated by nonsurgical means, an oral-maxillofacial surgeon may need to reshape the disk and sew it back into place. However, the need for traditional surgery is relatively rare since the introduction of procedures such as arthroscopy All surgical procedures are used in combination with splint therapy.

A person with osteoarthritis in a temporomandibular joint needs to rest the jaw as much as possible, use a splint or other device to control muscle tightness, and take an analgesic or another nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drug for pain. The pain usually goes away in 6 months with or without treatment. Even without treatment, most of the symptoms subside, probably because the band of tissue behind the disk becomes scarred and functions like the original disk. Usually, jaw movement is sufficient for normal activities, though the jaw may not open as wide as it used to.

Rheumatoid arthritis of the temporomandibular joint is treated with the drugs used for rheumatoid arthritis of any joint Maintaining joint mobility and preventing fusion of the joint are particularly important. Usually, the best way to accomplish these goals is by exercising the jaw under a physical therapist's direction. To relieve symptoms, particularly muscle tightness, the person wears a splint at night that does not restrict jaw movement. If joint fusion freezes the jaw, the person may need surgery and, in rare cases, an artificial joint to restore jaw mobility.

Occasionally, stretching exercises help people with calcification, but people with calcification or bone fusion usually need surgery to restore jaw movement.

Prevention and treatment of dislocation resulting from hypermobility are the same as those for other causes of a dislocated jaw. Many people who experience repeated dislocations learn how to maneuver the joint back into place themselves by consciously relaxing the muscles and lightly shifting the lower jaw until it pops back into place. Surgery to tighten the ligaments of the temporomandibular joint is sometimes necessary to prevent recurrent dislocations.

Sunday, July 12

Sigh.



First of all I'd like to thank TTS 10 and TTS 09 for the two weeks advance birthday cake. I really thought the cake was just for Karan, but I was wrong. Thank you so much everyone. *smiles




So this week has been fully occupied with activities, with netball the other day with them FeeQs, then there was fishing, yes fishing on Thursday night with the Mister and Peej and there's alone time with the Mister.

I don't really know why this week has been rather rocky but I do hope things will get better in time. It makes me sad that my trials on letting my guards down has nothing but an error. I just don't know why, but I'm trying my best to be giving more than I have.

It really sucks that there's been a gray gray cloud on my head for the past week. It sucks that there's been nothing more than little misunderstandings since last month. I don't know how things will end up. Honestly saying, I'm scared and worried.

...would you help me let my guards down?

Friday, July 10

I am not liking this. *sighs

Wednesday, July 8

Ninja!

Sports, I love sports, and yesterday I did a sport which I enjoy since high school years. *smiles. Glad to be playing netball again, since the hiatus from the jogs and swims with the Mister.

And today, I became a ninja all because I just don't wanna wear the face mask, so I ended up wearing those Arab headscarves and twirled it around and turned myself into a Ninja. *giggles.

It was funny how I came to the Stadium today, when I was still in the car, the B Fella was waving like crazy like really excited to see me or something. *giggles. I had a good two hours with the Mister today, it felt good to laugh our heads silly. Everything just seems to freeze, and somewhat at a distant when we're together. *smiles. And i quote the B Fella, "macam honeymoon saja kamu ane." *laughs.

Anyhoos, I want to go shopping! I need to get shitloads of clothes. Wardrobe needs some change. *sigh.

...believe me, we'll work it out

Monday, July 6

Face Mask.


I feel like I should post something up but I'm not too sure what I should be posting. *thinks.

Oh yes, today school officially started again, we've to go through some temperature check-ups before we could go to our respective classes. And today I pretty much played around with the face mask in class and to my surprise I was pretty quiet in class today all because Ratna wasn't around. School's a little dead and I'd like to say Welcome to the new intake.

All I did in class for two hours was doodling on my notebook. And I couldn't stand being in class with nothing to do so I hopped out class.

It's been raining lately, and it sucks being at home having nothing to do. Well I do have that assignment to finish up, but that could wait, I'm just half way done with it anyways. I'm bored, hungry and I wanna be with the Mister, but it's okay I'll do that tomorrow, I don't wanna sound needy unlike some people I know.

Well, I shall be off wandering around the house looking for food now.

...i missed you today

Sunday, July 5

Untitled.

Time is 0337. School is re-opening tomorrow (Monday). It has been 3 weeks since school's out and my brain is dying on me. I've got an assignment that's due this Tuesday and I can't even do it cause my brain is slacking very much.

I had a brief night out, pretty brief. But I'm not complaining. As long as I had the chance to see the Mister I'm all good. It was the greatest feeling, I was anxious to see him cause it has been a little while since not spending every second with him, he's been pretty busy for the past couple of days and it's okay with me though at times I feel the need that he should be around.

Saturday, July 4

Little Rants.


I'm pretty much feeling a little mellow, but it's a good one though. These little thoughts from last night's conversation with FeeQs made me think. It is sort of a little hard being in a new relationship. There are obstacles to face before moving on to another one, and having to know the past isn't really the past because the past is somehow a part of the present relationship, y'get what I mean? And along the way, getting to know these past and present people is quite tough, well just a little though.

The past has brought each one of us to where we are now, and made us stronger for a reason to not get hurt and all that. They have made us learn from our past mistakes and to not repeat it with the current one.

It made me think, whatever I'm about to say, is it okay or isn't it? Should I do this or shouldn't? What about this and that? These little thoughts where it brings us back to a certain time in the past makes us think whether it's okay to do it now. Thus it holds us back from doing such things. Doesn't that mean whatever we're trying to do for the current one isn't enough? Giving it all to another human being is hard, believe me. Been there, done it twice. But I don't want that to hold me back from not giving it my all now.

I do, I really do want to give it my all but I'm just scared to get hurt again in the end. There's this one saying "Don't fall in love hard, cause it'll get harder to fall out of it." Something like that.

Well this is just a thought really. Doesn't matter if it made sense or not. Just ranting out. *smiles

Princess.


Every night before I shut my eyes, I look up to see this written under my shelf and it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, and eventually it puts a smile on my face, and at times it sucks out the whole tension out of me. All I have to thank is the Mister, for being oh so thoughtful to leave a mark right where I can find it. *smiles.

I had a good day I must say, bought myself a pair of new shoes, with the company of FeeQs. Had a good time catching up with her too late night at TK. It was interesting how our conversation was all about relationships and how that the past have made us stronger today and we both agreed on the whole being in a new relationship is a little hard because you gotta start from scratch in knowing the opposite sex, but we're not complaining cause where we are right now is awesome. It was nice, real nice to catch up with her.

Parents are coming back in exactly 5 and a half hours from Dubai. Immediate quarantine for them both for a week. Hope all is well for the both of them. Can't wait to see what they're bringing back from Dubai and Oman. *smiles.

...and I'm a princess cause my boyfriend says so

Thursday, July 2

Bored.


I've left this screen on for hours already and I have no idea what I should be posting up about.
Min left to Sri Lanka last week via Miri, thought I'd be seeing her before that, but didn't.

I'm getting bored of the holidays already, it's taking forever and brain is dying already. *sighs But on the brighter side, I get to spend my days and nights with my Mister. *smiles.

Today, the case has gone up to 90+ with 1 death. Fucked up isn't it? I went out with FeeQs in the evening, to get my material for my dress. *wide smile. And looking at the colour of the material and the embroidery on the material, I like it. I like it so much!

Well, my boyfriend is at home, busy working on an edit for my mum. It's a little quite in my room right now and it sucks. But for the pass three weeks, I've had him all to myself and its fun, with random barbeques late at night for ihavenoideahowmanytimesalready with the company of Niggs and Peej. I've literally used up my time alot this holiday.

Oh bad news is that Belle's leaving earlier than planned, and she's going to miss out on my birthday. *sighs.

...24 days til it's the 26th