Feeling Under The Weather.

It has been raining since last week. Rain just doesn't stop falling. The downpour has caused floods all around the country - okay i sounded like a reporter right there. Haha! Well yeah, it has caused flash floods everywhere and if you checked out Rano's page, you've seen the picture of the underpass. The worse ever.

Due to the whole rainy season, i out of nowhere, just feel under the weather. I haven't been so keen to go out for the whole week this week. I just don't know why. I just feel like staying away from everyone in general.

I don't know, i just missed being at home i think? I'm in denial i think. Well seriously, i've been at home since Tuesday, make that Monday. I haven't been out that much this week. Been doing alot of thinking.

And in comfort of me bedroom, i miss Azmil. Or am i just missing the feeling of being taken care of? Being loved and all that? I'm confused.

It has been 5 months and 8 days. Yes i counted. :) I have been single since then. Not looking forward to be committed to another person. Nahh, i think i'm better off this way for now. I've got to concentrate on my studies.

I've got to maintain and get better results this year if i wanna get that scholarship.
Ofcourse i want to, who doesn't? 5 Merits & 3 Passes. I could do better than that!

Final year has come and i need to keep a low profile from the whole partying and shit like that. I've lots of things to take care of now.

And the weekend is here. Andie has things in mind and i have no idea what the plan is yet cause all details are with Koo. I haven't talked with that boy since..Tuesday? Yeah. And i am not even keen on knowing what's going on this Saturday at all. I'm thinking of staying in. Really. But it all depends on whether i can stand it staying at home for 4 days straight now. Heh!

Well its raining again, for the past 20 minutes or so. And its 2:11AM, i should be in bed right now. But i just can't sleep. There's alot going on in this head of mine and it sucks that i have no one to talk to.

I guess i should try and get some sleep now.
Ciao for now.

PS: I miss You.

As promised.

Narcissist.

Vanity Struck. Will be posting up more pictures soon.

Workin' Hard.

I found out my ND1 result, and its interesting. :)

I got

Merits

And..


Passes

So now i know where i stand. I need to get atleastc3 distinctions for my final year and also maintain my results. Be more responsible as lecturers comment about moi as quoted "An Intelligent Student Who Needs To Be Responsible" Tsk tsk tsk.

Well that's that.

Blabberings.

I have started editing again. It has been awhile since i last edited. :)
Well lets see, i have been busy much with college work. Presentation after presentation.
Seriously, i've to work my ass off this year.

Been having lots of outings with the brother and Piccolo. And as usual having late night coffees and cigarettes with the good friend, Koo. Yes, everyone still thinks i'm dating Koo. Whatever they say, i don't care cause whatever is going on between me and Koo isn't gonna be what everyone thinks it would be - a relationship.

I'd rather concentrate on my studies and i have been fine on my own. I have been independent very much. It really shows that i'd rather have a good guy friend that wouldn't go away because of the littlest things i do wrong and all that. Its quite amazing how i could hold on to the whole rumors saying "Oh look, she's dating Koo." "Oh, did you know? They're dating?" Like what the F really, it doesn't always mean that a girl and guy hangs out together that they're dating lah people! Eugh! Narrow minded people. Think out of the box. Broaden your mind will you?

Well enough of that, last week was alright for moi, had a little chit chat with Cardiff. Pretty casual, was fine actually. Nothing harmful. Heh! Made me smile though. :) Hmm.. whatelse whatelse.

Oh, Happy Chinese New Year. Err.. Whatelse. Hmm.. I'm guessing that's it? Well yeah. That's about it for now. :)

Editorials.

My first few edits for this year. :)

Birthday Celeb.

So Thursday night, we celebrated mom's birthday.
We had barbecue. I invited them girls over along with Tubs too.
Well the morning started with greeting mom happy birthday.

And during brunch break, i bought her a cupcake and left it in the fridge.
She thought that's the only present she'll get from me.
Little does she know, she got more after dinner.

We - Me, G and Hafiiz gathered our cash together and bought her a hand bag, lip glosses and also perfumes + lotions from Victoria's Secret.

It was such a nice night. After the whole dinner and all, we - me, nad, tubs, din, rats and zai along with G and Hafiiz went on a night cruise. Checking out the whole black out in town. Gadong and Qlap were dark as hell, as well as the whole stretch to Istana. It was dark and creepy. Eugh!

Well its great to experience such history that happened in Brunei. That's actually the first and worst flash flood that affected a whole lot of Brunei.
Check out more info on this on rano's web or just Google Brunei Flash Flood 20th Jan 2009. :) Happy reading.

Night Of The Flood.

This was way before we went out.
The good friend. :) at au lait while waiting for the rain to stop and roads to be cleared.
And this is before 11PM, the water from the canal flooded the whole of Pasar Gadong. Unbelievable.

Thanks For The Invites.

This was last night at Chateu AR.
For Zira's birthday. :)
We came fashionably late, and left at about 12 ish or so.
We had to go to Batong, played Rock Band for a bit and left an hour later.
Where Koo and I had to go to Lodge, to meet up with the Goons.

Headed back home at about 3.

Well, i can't keep this up. I've things to sort out and organize myself this year as much as possible.
I managed to outline some of the things i needed to sort out on a note pad already.
And if i keep it that way, i am sure i can earn it.

And yes, its that time of year where i always say,
"Organize yourself! Manage yourself! Balance yourself!"

And last but not least,

A Happy Birthday To A Dear Friend,
Hadz Hassan.

May Allah bless you my friend and may you and Zai live retardedly ever after. Love you both much!

Green Grass.

Twas a good night of making everyone happy.

Heh!

And those was yesterday on Wednesday. :)




And these was just now. :)

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday Jak Jak!

Well anyhoots, sorry for the lack of updates. Been busy since college started. :/
It has only been a week and we've got shitload of work due already.
And ain't it but a bitch that we have to submit our Final Project Title Proposal next Saturday. Eugh!
Stressing out much!

And apparently today is the 13th again. Sigh. Eugh!
I don't have much to say for now.

Will try to update as much as possible.

Ciao!

Bengs.

This is to Nabilah Hassan.

You are being missed by everyone. Especially your girlfriends.
We miss having silly jokes and laughs with you.
And most of all, we love you alot!
No matter what, we'll always be there for you.

and this is for you.

Stay Strong.

When life seems to get you down,
When all you seem to do is frown,
When your luck seems like it's running out,
When all you want to do is screem and shout,
Remember I'm always here for you,
No matter what life puts you through,
I'll always try to make you smile,
To help you see it'll all be worthwhile,
So be strong now don't give up your fight,
Just keep that precious goal in sight.

By Tina Louise.

There are some bad things in my past.
I’ve tried to move on but it doesn’t last.
Self forgiveness is a very hard task.
There are some bad things in my past.

Why do I feel this awful pain?
My thoughts have become so inane.
What is wrong inside my brain?
Why do I feel this awful pain?

Why can’t I be like others seem?
I look the same but inside I scream.
Why can’t this bad side be a dream?
Why can’t I be like others seem?

I feel like I have lost control.
Like something’s pulling at my soul.
Sucking me down into a hole.
I feel like I have lost control.

Something is coming that I hate.
It’s something that I can not sate.
It’s hard to fight what you think is fate.
Something’s coming that I hate.

I don’t want to be who I used to be,
But that person is still in me.
I feel him wanting to be free.
I don’t want to be who I used to be.

The urge to backslide holds me tight.
When I’m tired and out of fight.
I’ve lost what’s wrong and what is right.
The urge to backslide holds me tight.

When life is hard and the road is long,
I try to think of that simple song.
They are weak but he is strong.
When life is hard and the road is long.

By Anonymous.

Faces.

From Top left: Azmil, Aslin, Rats, Tubs, Nads, Koo.
From Bottom left : Maya, Aisya, Kay, Billah, Jason, John.

These faces, these faces have brought me here where i am today.
These faces, has put a lot of smiles on my face.
These faces, has played a big role in my life.
These faces, are the faces that i adore, i cherish.
These faces, are the faces of my friends that i can count on.

First.

Amin Si Pengusutkan Makan.

And first day of college went alright. Went to see our lecturer then stayed in E6. Was hoping to see the tables arranged like it used to be and sit where i sit, sadly, i could not see the table that i usually sit. hmph! sekali the whole ceiling fan pun nada. standing fan pun nada! panas macam babi tarus E6 ah!

Sekali Amin mengusut like hell kelaparan. So we - me, Rats, Amin, Jak Jak, Baby Boy and Suib went off to Indomee, sekali indomee close. And we went off far away to CAM Serusop. Haha!

Back to college by 1045 or so and, i went back home at about 11ish right after Rats. I skipped the afternoon since nada class langsung.

And became a designated driver for Koo. He just came back from his 3 weeks holiday in KL and Bangkok. So i had to drive them Koo, B and Bang Myrull back to their destinations. First sent Bang Myrull back home and then had to drive illegally(since roadtax belum siap) to Gadong and send B to the shop. Chilled for abit at the shop and headed to send Koo back.

Headed home and changed to go and do my first excersice for 2009. Played Netball at UBD with the company of FeeQs and The Zakaria's. Went to TK after and headed home before 10.

And here i am updating this. :)



And currently having a convo with Miss Singapore - Belle! I love ya!

In hands.

And tomorrow is the first day of college.
Not excited, but at least i have something to do to occupy my time. :)
Got everything done except for my logbook.
Its still empty as hell. I started a little already.
Yet to fill in the blanks.

And i kind of finished decorating my notebook.
Will show you sometime soon. :)

And i got online with Aslin for a bit earlier in the evening.
And greeted him and so he thanked for the greet and the tag.

So that means, he - Azmil, got his gift already in hand.
I hope he likes it. Though its not that appropriate for him to wear in winter.
But hey! I know he likes wearing shirts, collared shirts and all that. :)

Well, as for now, its time for some shut eye.
Good night everyone!


Front Cover


Back Cover

I miss you, and it has been 4 months plus.
Tell me, why, why is it so hard for me to let you go.
Though I tend to occupy my time hanging out with friends,
At the end of the day/night,
Its YOU that occupies my mind.

The last thing i think of at night before i go to sleep,
Its You.

I miss you.
My heart still yearns for you.
Thus, i still put efforts on trying to make you smile and feel all warm inside.

I hope, that one day, some day,
Something or someone will open your eyes,
And talk you through all this.

And tell you to look back and think of what things we've been through together.

I'm sorry but yes, i still love you.

Hopes.

And today is Aslin's birthday. Its the 4th of Jan.



Happy birthday Buddy! Hope you have a smashing birthday back in the UK.

And since it was the 3rd yesterday, that means my little package should be in his hands by now. His as in Azmil.
And this is what i got him..





I hope he'll like it.

That's for now.

Happy..

Birthdays going to..

1st Jan - Zaki.
2nd Jan - Ayen.
3rd Jan - Aliff. Hanani.
4th Jan - Aslin!
5th Jan - Abg Rod.
22nd Jan - Mummy.
24th Jan - Azmi.
28th Jan - Unchu.

Have a smashing birthdayb to all of you!

Happy New Year Ya'll.

I spent my new year's eve with my brother and his girlfriend, G. and Hafiiz's friends in Miri.
Twas an interesting night. Though my countdown was pretty much sadistic because i kinda cried! yes, i did.
None the less, it was a good night. :)




And i have come up with a few 2009 resolutions.

1. Study my ass off for my final year!
2. Cut down a little bit on smoking.
3. Try and start praying - insya allah
4. Be a good girl. Well try to atleast.
5. Cut down partying since its my final year.

Well that's for now.

And there's a little package coming your way.. :)